All Tapped Out

I started rehearsal this week for a musical.  Said musical surprised me when it announced that after the audition and after the casting and after the first few rehearsals, there would be another brief audition to test each cast member’s ability to tap dance.

I’ve danced for years, but tap is a class I’ve never taken.  So I went out and bought brand new shoes right before the “audition,” thinking I’d be able to pick up the routine as we practiced it.

Turns out there was no routine.  We were asked to do a time step.  Which looks tres cool if I do say so myself.  Except I have no clue how it’s done.  I just sort of stared as each person went one by one, and as it drew nearer to the time of my execution, I prayed the floor would swallow me momentarily to let the soon-to-be-extremely-uncomfortable-moment pass (Perhaps I should’ve used my “distraction” pee-in-my-pants technique.).

Well, that selfish floor just left me standing there all alone.  Bastard.

When it came to my turn, I cautiously mentioned my slight lack of experience (RE: I HAD NEVER EVEN WORN TAP SHOES BEFORE A FEW HOURS AGO).  Instead of the time step, I was asked to do a “simple” flap move.  Still, I had no clue what I was supposed to be doing.  I sort of did this weird slide thing with my foot and tapped out a few sounds before letting out a breathy laugh (NOTHING was funny about this situation) and just stopping.  I just thank God that everyone was surrounding me in a semi-circle, because who knows what would have happened if my embarrassment had gone un-checked?!  It would have been sheer disaster.  People need to be put in their places once in awhile, dammit!

So after my debacle of a flap, the choreographer had us all practice the level “child” flap together.  Kumbay-freaking-ya.  And again, by the time it got to me (even though I’d been practicing the move again and again in my head), I for some reason resumed my weird slide sound off and followed up with another weird laugh and then finally, silence.

Needless to say, I will not be dancing in that number.  (Fear not my fellow slutmuffins, for I will still make appearances in several other numbers – and I will be channeling my inner sex kitten just for you.)

But just for kicks and giggles, I did channel a little “tap” in Thursday’s outfit (apologies for the delays…it’s been a crazy week getting back into the swing of “normal”/non-vacation life).  This skirt had a bit of a “Thoroughly Modern Millie” vibe – and I loved it!  Yeeeaaaaaah buddy.

And as for the moral of today?  Embrace the awkward.  It’s a necessary evil.


(I paired a khaki sheer button-up with a black blazer, a red pleated skirt, patterned black tights, red pumps, and a simple gold necklace.)DSC_1001


Shirt (Love Culture), Blazer (Forever 21), Skirt/Tights/Shoes (Target), Necklace (Open Sky)


2 thoughts on “All Tapped Out

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